Wednesday, August 25, 2004
Right now Im at Mom and Dad's house. Doing the laundry. I feel glum. I did my practical exam. Yikes. I was nervous and it got the better of me. I didnt do that badly, mainly all A-'s two A's and a B+. Not a lot I can complain about really, but I didnt do as well and I know I can and that bothers me. Moms cooking something yummy with barbeque salmon and feta cheese. Smells good. I cant type right now. I keep pressing the wrong buttons. Its bugging me. I wore my hair up today, something that I dont do often and it hurts. You know how when you rarely wear your hair up and then you wear it tight it hurts? Well thats what Im experiencing right now. I know why Im bothered by my marks, its because I want to be perfect. (I keep jumping from topic to topic) Im so hard on myself and I dont know how to not be. Kyle told me it doesnt even matter, if I get straight As or Cs, once I graduate no one looking to hire me will even know or care. That seems kind of like a rip off to me, for those who do well enough for some recognition. Rainy days are here. I dont mind particularly unless it wrecks soccer tonight. I was excited to be able to use my rainbow umbrella today. Why am I so easily amused by simple things? I watched Laws of Attraction today and yesterday (we stopped it last night because Kyle was tired). It was good. I really enjoyed Pierce Brosmans character and I feel that the twins would as well. Its a good one. A little corny at times but fun. I told Kyle that if he didnt take care of his hair, that Im cutting it. Earlier he had told me that it was my decision when it would get cut. Yesterday it just looked so not done that I was like Im cutting your hair tomorrow. And he was regretful of that so I had to soften up a little and tell him that if he didnt take care of it I would cut it. I fell like a mother, saying things like that. And to a boy! Hopefully it'll start looking normal. I dont want a husband that looks like a grandpa who cant do his wispy thinning hair. Know what I mean?

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